Guys….is it just me or…

[ParadiseDreams]

So, not anywhere here and more on Facebook but, I’m finding that a lot of the people that claim to be in the “community” are not community spirited people.
What I mean is, they can be very rude and they kinda in a way come across as if they’ve been in our community since 1642 when really they only joined recently and I’m not even sure if they’re on established forums such as our own.
Like, they’ll post something completely incorrect and you’ll gently, and in a friendly manner, correct them or attempt to steer them towards truth and they’ll argue and stand on their hill.
Now generally on Facebook I wouldn’t care about people like that but when it’s dealing with ponies there is so much misinformation and as a responsible member of the community I do care.

Am I the only one noticing this?


Additional side note: remember, I am a returning member of the post and my original join date was around 00’ so, I am a long standing member of our community.

 

[AutumnRoan]

I don't know about you, but I've noticed that one of the most human things of all, is to get extra defensive when a human suspects they might be wrong. Seniority won't be enough to sway them, nor will anyone who shows that they clearly have practical experience. It's just a foible of being caught out.

We could, right here, come up with a tier list of seniority, or a ranking based upon the size of one's collection or some other metric to make the social structure of this community logical, but ... I don't think it would do anything to dissuade this foible. And being right is valuable, but when it comes to communities, it takes delicacy to bring people around to a consensus, because of this human tendency. It's just the way it is, and I wish there was an emoji of a pony shrugging.

We're glad you made your way back here, because we love having you around in the bunch. I may be only a recent member to this community, two years in, but I always hope that I can still contribute in some way, some fragments of fun and experience. And I hope this wasn't so confrontational that I've raised the hackles of this foible in you.

 

[ParadiseDreams]

I don't know about you, but I've noticed that one of the most human things of all, is to get extra defensive when a human suspects they might be wrong. Seniority won't be enough to sway them, nor will anyone who shows that they clearly have practical experience. It's just a foible of being caught out.

We could, right here, come up with a tier list of seniority, or a ranking based upon the size of one's collection or some other metric to make the social structure of this community logical, but ... I don't think it would do anything to dissuade this foible. And being right is valuable, but when it comes to communities, it takes delicacy to bring people around to a consensus, because of this human tendency. It's just the way it is, and I wish there was an emoji of a pony shrugging.

We're glad you made your way back here, because we love having you around in the bunch. I may be only a recent member to this community, two years in, but I always hope that I can still contribute in some way, some fragments of fun and experience. And I hope this wasn't so confrontational that I've raised the hackles of this foible in you.

No, I agree and I’m with you on everything you said.
When misinformation is presented I add to the conversation what I know to be true and if they get defensive I just back away. The reason for this is what you said, you’re absolutely correct that they won’t be able to be brought around & it is human nature. If they change their mind in the future it’s because they found the alternative to their truth on their own.
Also, I don’t like to jeopardize my own peace by arguing with people like that.
I do add to the conversation with what I know to be true because I do think as a responsive member of the community - we should. Many people read the Facebook group posts so, factual information should be presented to help guide them on their collecting adventure.

AutumnRoan I wouldn’t see you as a recent member after two years of being active on the post. You have much to give and I like what you contribute. I think you might’ve misunderstood part of my post and that’s my fault for not elaborating, the only reason I added that bottom side note was not to show any type of seniority but more for people that might read what I said and think that I myself am newer to the community and wonder why I’m saying I’m more established. & in all fairness I did spent several years on hiatus.

 

[AutumnRoan]

lol I stay away from FB in general, so I can't help you there.
There's something socially strange going on with FB and Insta, and I just can't put my finger on it. I mostly has to do with, nobody contacts their friends directly as much, and so folks just assume you're following them on the old scroll, PLUS that the Algo will prioritise their news over others' or that you even have the attention to give to the old scroll.

As for incorrect information, usually, if it's true, sorts itself out, and emerges. You can lead a horse to water ...

 

[ParadiseDreams]

lol I stay away from FB in general, so I can't help you there.
There's something socially strange going on with FB and Insta, and I just can't put my finger on it. I mostly has to do with, nobody contacts their friends directly as much, and so folks just assume you're following them on the old scroll, PLUS that the Algo will prioritise their news over others' or that you even have the attention to give to the old scroll.

As for incorrect information, usually, if it's true, sorts itself out, and emerges. You can lead a horse to water ...

I’m with you on all of that as well. I stay on Facebook because it networks to many friends and family.
Plus it does also network me to important pages like the MD Meet.
I rarely post on my own page anymore but I do stay active with my own friends and family on there.

 

[minticat]

i'm not on FB/insta/any socials except tumblr, so i have no idea what the pony scene is like on those platforms, but i think part of the problem is social media just makes people so angry. i made the decision to delete my twitter a couple years ago cause it was wrecking my mental health and making me irrationally angry over everything, and i realized it wasn't good for me and not my character. the algorithms love anger though, so everybody stays cranky. someone might get defensive over ponies cause they're already running hot over some other issue they saw on their feed 2 seconds ago.

 

[CharmsPonies]

I totally second the idea that people online tend to be angrier on social media. Anger is what primarily drives views and clicks and gets the most attention, so when you act angry you might be rewarded with more attention.

For the most part my experience with people have been good… Except for on discord where I’ve encountered exactly what you’re talking about.
I had joined a big pony server and I ended up leaving it for a variety of issues (I felt like it was poorly run, the mods were overly nice to the point where they wouldn’t stop people from acting out of line for far too long, there was so much drama, ect.) But I remember one day someone used the term “nirvana” incorrectly (using it to refer to a rare g4 toy), they got very politely corrected, and then they very defensively blew up swearing at people and causing a fuss for like an hour. Very unpleasant.
But I’ve also had good experiences on discord, I have my own pony server that is way way way smaller and people tend to be very civil and nice, if they disagree with each other they do it politely. Maybe it has something to do with age? On my server a lot of the users are very late teens to adults, and in the bigger server there were a lot more younger teenagers (like 14 year olds) and I do think when you’re younger it’s easier to get very upset if someone disagrees with your opinion or tries to correct you.

In general I think the pony fandom is great! Specifically the toy collecting community. It is so so interesting to me how there’s kind of two pony fandoms (the bronies who predominately like the shows from g4 and up and the general pony fans who like all generations.) I feel like the brony community is so big, there’s good people in it but also bad people just because of the pure size of it. In any group you’ll always run into bad apples every so often, the bigger the fandom the bigger the drama sometimes.

I do think it’s dependent on Which social media you’re on (Smaller forums like this one are great! Things like Twitter can turn messy with drama fast just because of the culture that’s on that website.)

 

[ParadiseDreams]

i'm not on FB/insta/any socials except tumblr, so i have no idea what the pony scene is like on those platforms, but i think part of the problem is social media just makes people so angry. i made the decision to delete my twitter a couple years ago cause it was wrecking my mental health and making me irrationally angry over everything, and i realized it wasn't good for me and not my character. the algorithms love anger though, so everybody stays cranky. someone might get defensive over ponies cause they're already running hot over some other issue they saw on their feed 2 seconds ago.

Minticat - that’s a very good point too. I’ll keep that in mind in the future. Very accurate and useful tip.

CharmsPonies - yes, that’s what I’m talking about and I think you maybe hit the nail on the head. It’s not just me & only a tiny fraction of my posts that I may have to experience anything like what I mentioned but I see a lot of pony people have this happen to them and it’s always like, “whoa!”

 

[Moonbreeze]

I'm only on FB, although I am forever debating whether to start an Instagram account for my art/ customs.

It's less relaxed than on the Forums, but I'm not on FB all the time. It drains my energy a bit faster than on here for example. I only go on FB if I really feel like it.

Social media can be more 'me me me' than a forum like this. People can be the rudest, even with 'old timer' collectors giving tips or opinions (I think with a faded Nirvana pony, the poster said it was lies and continued to claim it was a OOAK in the most toxic way I've seen in a while).

I agree with algorithms loving anger. It's just like hatewatching on youtube or elsewhere makes the most revenue So stay on here if you like more good vibes in general

 

[ParadiseDreams]

I'm only on FB, although I am forever debating whether to start an Instagram account for my art/ customs.

It's less relaxed than on the Forums, but I'm not on FB all the time. It drains my energy a bit faster than on here for example. I only go on FB if I really feel like it.

Social media can be more 'me me me' than a forum like this. People can be the rudest, even with 'old timer' collectors giving tips or opinions (I think with a faded Nirvana pony, the poster said it was lies and continued to claim it was a OOAK in the most toxic way I've seen in a while).

I agree with algorithms loving anger. It's just like hatewatching on youtube or elsewhere makes the most revenue So stay on here if you like more good vibes in general

I already have been gravitating to here mostly anyways for the reasons you mentioned.
You said “old timer collectors” - if it’s a thing it’s my first time hearing it. It made me crack up.
I did notice the me,me,me thing too, and the vulture like mentality too kinda took me back - people sometimes post their ponies and other people are immediately like, “ILL BUY HER” & it’s like, “ew” because the op never said it was for sale. So, Moonbreeze, I like your idea, I’ll just stay here.

 

[ChocolateStarfire]

Hey Paradise Dreams

I am sorry you've experienced a taste of what 'fandom' can do to folks in online spaces. :/

I agree with Charms...a lot of social media is geared toward getting you upset. I have to limit my doomscrolling because of that. I've also left a lot of social media platforms the past two years and I will say I feel so much better for it.

I have to stay on Instagram and YouTube because those are my last social media lifelines workwise. I post my art/ponies there most of the time, and it's how I get my news from friends/few celebs I care about. I have heavily curated my feeds and block/mute/ignore a lot of things. And I time my doomscrolling--trying to cut down to 1 hour max per day.

I deactivated Facebook, I left Twitter/X, and I don't have TikTok. I am considering removing the apps I do have from my phone to lessen the distraction. I prefer communicating with folks online through forums like the TP because I like well thought out responses and civil discussion. There's more room for nuance, and processing. 30 seconds is not enough time for our minds as humans to sit with what was shown/said...it is a dopamine fix that many get in those moments, nothing more.

Like most mediums say--which is the wisest advice I've ever heard and taken to heart--take what resonates, and leave the rest. Stepping away is better than confronting, even when you know misinformation is being spread. Sometimes it's best to let that person experience being wrong in another way--usually folks will take that better from within their own friend circle than from someone outside it. It's a painful lesson I've learned a lot over the years. (And as an educator, yeah oof it's so hard to face the arguments that come when people realize they've been wrong or misled, because it does happen, and I have to just let it go to keep going, you know?)

Long story short--I hear you, and again I am sorry you dealt with a person not taking what you said well.

 

[dannahbanana]

I'd just like to add...let's not put too much value on how long someone has been in a community vs. how much they have positively contributed. I'm relatively "new" and joined MLP Arena, MLPTP, and the Facebook and Instagram communities in Nov 2020. But that doesn't mean it is a fad for me or that I am not serious about the community. I'd like to think I've learned a lot in my short time here, and many people tag me when a question about Japanese Takara, for instance, arises because I have gained a lot of knowledge in their area in the short time I've been a member of the community. I've helped organize and set up events such as PFF and have presented a panel there as well along with a friend. I'd like to think people don't assume negatively about someone based on how long they have been in a community. You have to start somewhere. That being said, I do see a lot of newer people spreading misinformation or acting a little bit like a "know it all" on Fb, and it irks me sometimes. However, personally the Instagram toy community has been an exceptionally positive experience for me. People are very supportive there in my experience. I've taken a step back from Facebook a little in the toy community, but I think a lot of people have in part for the reason you mentioned. It can be negative and there are gatekeepers everywhere.

 

[ParadiseDreams]

Hey Paradise Dreams

I am sorry you've experienced a taste of what 'fandom' can do to folks in online spaces. :/

I agree with Charms...a lot of social media is geared toward getting you upset. I have to limit my doomscrolling because of that. I've also left a lot of social media platforms the past two years and I will say I feel so much better for it.

I have to stay on Instagram and YouTube because those are my last social media lifelines workwise. I post my art/ponies there most of the time, and it's how I get my news from friends/few celebs I care about. I have heavily curated my feeds and block/mute/ignore a lot of things. And I time my doomscrolling--trying to cut down to 1 hour max per day.

I deactivated Facebook, I left Twitter/X, and I don't have TikTok. I am considering removing the apps I do have from my phone to lessen the distraction. I prefer communicating with folks online through forums like the TP because I like well thought out responses and civil discussion. There's more room for nuance, and processing. 30 seconds is not enough time for our minds as humans to sit with what was shown/said...it is a dopamine fix that many get in those moments, nothing more.

Like most mediums say--which is the wisest advice I've ever heard and taken to heart--take what resonates, and leave the rest. Stepping away is better than confronting, even when you know misinformation is being spread. Sometimes it's best to let that person experience being wrong in another way--usually folks will take that better from within their own friend circle than from someone outside it. It's a painful lesson I've learned a lot over the years. (And as an educator, yeah oof it's so hard to face the arguments that come when people realize they've been wrong or misled, because it does happen, and I have to just let it go to keep going, you know?)

Long story short--I hear you, and again I am sorry you dealt with a person not taking what you said well.

Thank you ChocolateStarfire, I think I’m going to just distance myself from the pony groups on there. Your advice is top notch too and I love that quote


Dannahbanana - first of all, is Posey your favorite pony because she’s one of mine & so, I love your signature!! Also, it’s honestly not about how long anyone has been in the community and I do think I could’ve worded it better - I’ll admit I tried and failed but what you put:

“That being said, I do see a lot of newer people spreading misinformation or acting a little bit like a "know it all" on Fb, and it irks me sometimes.”

That’s my point in an eggshell so I know you get it.
Also, I think it’s awesome that you know a lot about Japanese Takara because I know nothing about them and I’d like to learn more. They’re adorable, do you have any?

 

[dannahbanana]

Thank you ChocolateStarfire, I think I’m going to just distance myself from the pony groups on there. Your advice is top notch too and I love that quote


Dannahbanana - first of all, is Posey your favorite pony because she’s one of mine & so, I love your signature!! Also, it’s honestly not about how long anyone has been in the community and I do think I could’ve worded it better - I’ll admit I tried and failed but what you put:

“That being said, I do see a lot of newer people spreading misinformation or acting a little bit like a "know it all" on Fb, and it irks me sometimes.”

That’s my point in an eggshell so I know you get it.
Also, I think it’s awesome that you know a lot about Japanese Takara because I know nothing about them and I’d like to learn more. They’re adorable, do you have any?

Yes, Posey is my very favorite! She is what got me into collecting. I saw her picture in a MLP book and just thought she was so pretty when I was a kid. Then in 2020 I came across that book again, and decided to buy a Posey for myself. It went downhill from there lol! Now I have a big herd along with her.

I lived in Japan for awhile, so I worked hard learning as much as I can about Takara since they were unique to Japan. At first I thought they looked kind of silly, but once I held one for the first time in my own hands, I fell in love. I have 4 adult takara and the babies right now, but have had more in the past. If you ever want to learn more about them, send me a message.

Don't worry about your wording too much, I understood what you were getting at. I feel like I am given unsolicited advice or facts about ponies from newer members quite often. Sometimes I find it endearing, because I remember when I was a new starry eyed newbie, but sometimes I have to roll my eyes because it feels like the pony version of Mansplaining. Ponysplaining? lol

 

[ParadiseDreams]

Yes, Posey is my very favorite! She is what got me into collecting. I saw her picture in a MLP book and just thought she was so pretty when I was a kid. Then in 2020 I came across that book again, and decided to buy a Posey for myself. It went downhill from there lol! Now I have a big herd along with her.

I lived in Japan for awhile, so I worked hard learning as much as I can about Takara since they were unique to Japan. At first I thought they looked kind of silly, but once I held one for the first time in my own hands, I fell in love. I have 4 adult takara and the babies right now, but have had more in the past. If you ever want to learn more about them, send me a message.

Don't worry about your wording too much, I understood what you were getting at. I feel like I am given unsolicited advice or facts about ponies from newer members quite often. Sometimes I find it endearing, because I remember when I was a new starry eyed newbie, but sometimes I have to roll my eyes because it feels like the pony version of Mansplaining. Ponysplaining? lol

I love most ponies in the Posey pose because I love Posey…also most of the yellow ponies I love too for the same reason. I bought 4 Poseys looking for that perfect one for my herd but the other favorite ponies I was fine with the first one. So, I think she really is my favorite, she makes me smile when I look at her, every time.
I love that you lived in Japan! I also have a collection of Japanese items that range from a full size parasol, to wall decorations, to the dolls (that my daughter is convinced are haunted). I also love anime so naturally, the first I saw the Takaras my jaw hit the floor and bounced a few times. I think you’ll be at the meet and so will I - I hope you’ll bring one with you so I can see one in person at least once in my lifetime!
I always have to worry about wording, I’m naturally an awkward person

 

[dannahbanana]

I love most ponies in the Posey pose because I love Posey…also most of the yellow ponies I love too for the same reason. I bought 4 Poseys looking for that perfect one for my herd but the other favorite ponies I was fine with the first one. So, I think she really is my favorite, she makes me smile when I look at her, every time.
I love that you lived in Japan! I also have a collection of Japanese items that range from a full size parasol, to wall decorations, to the dolls (that my daughter is convinced are haunted). I also love anime so naturally, the first I saw the Takaras my jaw hit the floor and bounced a few times. I think you’ll be at the meet and so will I - I hope you’ll bring one with you so I can see one in person at least once in my lifetime!
I always have to worry about wording, I’m naturally an awkward person

I may bring a takara to "show and tell!" Good idea. But yes, I look forward to meeting you in person I prefer typing or writing out my thoughts, because I think I sound a lot more "normal" that way. But wait until you meet me and you'll see how awkward I am in real life! lol Producing my thoughts into words I say outload is a challenge for me at times.

 

[ParadiseDreams]

I may bring a takara to "show and tell!" Good idea. But yes, I look forward to meeting you in person I prefer typing or writing out my thoughts, because I think I sound a lot more "normal" that way. But wait until you meet me and you'll see how awkward I am in real life! lol Producing my thoughts into words I say outload is a challenge for me at times.

I write better than I speak too so, I feel that completely.
Can’t wait to meet you too and I’m excited that you’ll bring a takara! Wait… is there a show and tell block at the event? If there isn’t I feel like there should be! If there is, I had no clue!
I’ll be vending at table 22? I think that’s my table number - look for an obnoxious amount of G3 ponies and playsets and that’s me.

 

[dannahbanana]

I write better than I speak too so, I feel that completely.
Can’t wait to meet you too and I’m excited that you’ll bring a takara! Wait… is there a show and tell block at the event? If there isn’t I feel like there should be! If there is, I had no clue!
I’ll be vending at table 22? I think that’s my table number - look for an obnoxious amount of G3 ponies and playsets and that’s me.

There is no official Show and Tell as far as I know, but that would be fun, wouldn't it? I'll be vending too! Not sure of my number yet

 

[Ms Twilight]

I may bring a takara to "show and tell!" Good idea. But yes, I look forward to meeting you in person I prefer typing or writing out my thoughts, because I think I sound a lot more "normal" that way. But wait until you meet me and you'll see how awkward I am in real life! lol Producing my thoughts into words I say outload is a challenge for me at times.

oooooooOooo! I'd love to see your Takara! I've never seen one in person! I will also be at the meet. I started going to them in 1642 (LOL @ParadiseDreams )

But yes! The FB groups are crazy... Lots of misinformation being passed around over there. I tend to stay on the Nirvana groups, which are much better with nicer people who don't bug you to sell them your show-and-tell items.

 

[ParadiseDreams]

oooooooOooo! I'd love to see your Takara! I've never seen one in person! I will also be at the meet. I started going to them in 1642 (LOL @ParadiseDreams )

But yes! The FB groups are crazy... Lots of misinformation being passed around over there. I tend to stay on the Nirvana groups, which are much better with nicer people who don't bug you to sell them your show-and-tell items.

I’m excited to see the Takara too!
The year…yeah I just kinda wrote random numbers and went with it
I wish I would’ve went to the meet that I signed up for so many years ago because it was one of the first ones and literally there’s only a few people that went that year - it may’ve kept me from going on full hiatus for so long like I did.
I’m not on the Nirvana groups because I only have Italian Blossom and Peachy - I didn’t think that qualified me as a Nirvana collector. I didn’t want to feel out of place there, but if they’re nicer then maybe I’ll look into them.